Monday, November 16, 2009

The Clash

>[The system] asked [him]: "If [she] asked you to go skydiving, would you accept?"
>[He] answered ''yup''

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Hey, random thought: do you want to go skydiving?

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you should be careful what you wish for. I am a pilot after all. i know plenty of people who jump out of planes.

i have not talked to you in years. how have you been?

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While my question was made in a jocular tone, my desire to go skydiving is independent and springs from the realm of the extreme, which excludes any carefulness. I am not one to be careful. Also, because your piloting scares people so much that they would rather take their chances outside of your plane and therefore leap from it, this is meant to meant to bring me caution as to the implicated reality of my words? I no longer have any physical fears, and neither does the introduction into reality give my dreams any more of a grasp on safety; to the contrary. It would be an oxymoron to carefully consider my thoughts of acting free of caution.

Your final statement aims to remind "me" of an observation "I" am equally capable of making, however you failed. In truth it has not been years, it has been an eternity and no time at all, for you have never spoken to me. I transcend time, and the only sense I make it is that of an s. And “how” am I? I cannot answer for the form of “who,” and am thereby rendered incapable of relating this to any function, for it is all relative. But perhaps you think not, or possibly have a definite form off of which to build a reply to your own, redirected question?

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What? i mean its just a question. but if you feel the need to write a novel to answer a question that could have just as easily been answered with a "I'm good" and we could go back to not talking for another "eternity". so whatever. I tried to be nice and you kind of spit in my face.

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It's clearly not "whatever," and I would apologize for hurting your feelings if I could find that spit of malice within my novel of a text. But no, if I had meant to spit at you I might have done so in person (for "I" did gleam through in those times, though you could not have seen) when it was actually easier; for what I wrote might have flown naturally from me, but it would have certainly have been easier (apart from the effort put into stepping away from myself) to type that insipid and meaningless (but for the pins reserved to make the lie smile) reply of "I'm good." It would seem to me that I was the one to extend kindness in showing that I valued you enough not to cast that lie upon you, and reveal instead to you the truth, however cryptic. Did you actually try? And if so, to promote a facade of a happy conversation in which each masked speaker tossed out a few pin-cheeked platitudes completely unrepresentative of the figures behind the masks? Is your preference that the fruit of truth be exsanguinated to the point of untruth, the mere shell? I can apologize for this: I misread you, and you have clearly done the same, so we are even on this one ground.

You may return to that eternal fog of ignorant bliss if that is your only desire, but I am free of that. Know that I wish you no ill, whoever you may be, and hope instead that you someday, even just for a glimpse, transcend that blinding, heavy haze.

WARNING: Not intended to be read as if written in a condescending tone, but additional apology offered should it be misread as such.

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